May 23, 2010
Captain Jusby, First Mate Miss Kate and their Pirate crew
Dear Jusby,
I am in need of a clown quickly, my son is having his 6th birthday party in Lacey WA. at Rainier Vista park on Sunday May 23rd, the party is from 3:30 to 6:30, but we need a clown for an hour or so. I know it’s short notice but he wanted a pirate party and well no pirates around here I guess, now he wants a clown. Is there anything you can do? What is your cost?
Thank You! A Mom
Dear Mom,
I am totally willing to tweak my costume and routine toward a Pirate themed party.
As you have noticed from the website, the pie-in-the-face is my specialty, and I find it best if parents have advance warning so they can be prepared with 1) spare clothes & 2) their own camera!
I’m thinking I’ll include:
Pirate Transformations (Scars, mustaches, temp tattoos)
Treasure Hunt (wild goose chase)
Balloon Swords
Of course, I’ll bring “Snowball” the pie-rat and plenty of pies.
***
I found an assistant who is available on Sunday: (“First Mate”) Miss Kate! She also attended The Silly Fool School of Top Secret Esoteric Clowning AND has clowned abroad with Patch Adams, AND she is a Certified Laughter Yoga Leader.
Her services are included in my rates. We will paint faces twice as fast. We will PIE faces twice as fast.
We can split guests into two teams for pirate games.
We can engage adults AND children simultaneously.
Oh, I love it when an assistant is available!
Jusby
Oh, kid, this is gonna be great! Are you absolutely sure you want this?
This girl kept trying to put the labcoat on forwards instead of backwards like a smock. We had a little matador action going on for a minute.
Jusby gives advice about pie-ing your own mother: “She carried you for nine months… don’t hurt her!”
Okay, Mom, this is what happens when you hire Jusby.
Dad’s Turn!
Mission Accomplished
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Posted by Jusby the Clown
May 16, 2010
Bonus Flaming Pie & Song
After the Purim gig, I’d apparently made an impression on Simon because his dad decided to book me for a Pie Delivery special. I LOVE this level of service. I don’t have to lug as much stuff or wonder whether people will be open to the idea of a pie-in-the-face.
THAT’S WHAT THEY’RE HIRING ME FOR!
BIRTHDAY BOY!
They sign right up for it!
Two weeks later her mom says, “Every time she sees a pie she wants me to put it in her face!”
My assistant wanders off. “I got bored.”
Birthday Boy PIES his Grandma!
A delicate self-pieing with the smallest pie available.
BIRTHDAY BOY PIES DAD! HARD! WITH THE STEEL PIE PAN!
This IS what you were expecting, sir?
Then I gave Simon a private Comedy Consultation. “Your mom carried you in her body for 9 months. It will still be funny if you don’t break her nose. Less power with the same amount of accuracy this time!”
BIRTHDAY BOY PIES MOM! THIS FAMILY REALLY GETS IT!
Bridget makes Jusby look like a midget. Give the monster a strawberry with whipped cream!
Could I do ONE more before I leave? Yes.
This is how Jusby’s new total got to about 280 face pied!
Can I do 20 faces at the next gig for a nice round 300? Quite possibly.
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Posted by Jusby the Clown
May 16, 2010
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Posted by Jusby the Clown
May 9, 2010
I got a call during lunch on Friday from Jon, of AmericanSingingTelegrams.com asking if I was available Saturday. The client was an active duty serviceman serving in Iraq who wanted to wish his mom a happy mother’s day.
The last time Jon called he had been looking for a guy in a gorilla suit, and this time he was asking after Elvis.
“I’ve got a train conductor… secret agent… doctor… uh… “ Why does he keep asking for these redonkulous things!?
Well, it’s because these are what John Q. Public from Anytown, USA wants in a singing telegram, and these are the costumes listed and pictured on their website. >Note the position of ‘CLOWN’
OUR COSTUMES (availabilty varies per region):
.: GORILLA
.: PINK GORILLA
.: CHICKEN
.: BROADWAY TUX/TOP HAT
.: HIT MAN/SOPRANOS
.: GRIM REAPER/FUNERAL MOURNER
.: ELVIS
.: MARILYN
.: SINATRA
.: AUSTIN POWERS
.: FRENCH MAID
.: NAUGHTY NURSE
.: BAG LADY
.: DOCTOR
.: SHOWGIRL
.: MALE BALLERINA
.. (fun drag, tutuguy)
.: DANCING HEART
… (valentines, anniversary, love)
.: POLICEMAN
.: COWBOY/GIRL
.: CLOWN
.: BELLY DANCER
.: BIKINIGRAM
We settled on the Tuxedo and Top Hat. I told him that it was a white tux with tails and had primary color buttons: a clown tux, you know. As it got closer I started to wonder whether I was even supposed to be a clown. Then I knew that I couldn’t wear a clown tux, act like a clown, and sing like a clown without wearing a clown nose.
It would dilute my brand to do anything but show up as Jusby… and give the mom her telegram on Jusby stationary… and sing Jusby’s signature song.
So that’s what I did… wearing a tux jacket with shorts… gave her a HUGE bouquet in a vase, a balloon hat, and four helium balloons. Great gig!
The mom was naturally moved to tears by my customized serenade. The dad puddled up too. Or was it allergies?
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Posted by Jusby the Clown
April 25, 2010
Thanks, Berd!
Thanks, Kirsten
originally from Healing Journey with Dr. Roger Sty Bantam… features a brief cameo by Jusby the Clown during Procession of the Species 2010
Thanks, David
Definite Tiger Synchronicity Going on for the Year of the Tiger
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Posted by Jusby the Clown
April 2, 2010
On a tip from some pro-clowns, I started thinking about pitching my services to the Temple Beth Hatfiloh for their Purim Carnival. Then an old-school friend, Ozi, asked me if I was going to do more pies at Arts Walk. I told him that I didn’t make any money doing Arts Walk, but what I really wanted was to do pie-in-the-face at Purim and could he talk to the Rabbi. He said, “He’s my dad.”
I know that. That’s why I brought it up.
One thing led to another [#FCBK!], and the next thing I knew I had pied the Rabbi and received a check for “Ritual Expenses”.
Parked beside ‘Pin the Crown on Esther’
Starting off with a Mini. Loved his outfit! A loved one removed his yarmulke in time.
The Rabbi’s Son! His second time! The reason I got the gig!
Rabbi Goldstein is ready for his pie-in-the-face.
Um… he’s got to be praying here, right?
Then quiet reflection and ablutions.
Tibor has some nefarious intentions behind me! Ain’t happening, mensch!
Accept the inevitable.
Like So!
He’s glimpsed the ineffable!
Orion begged for his chance to have another pie-in-the-face.
Uh-Oh! The first kid seems insistent that I get pied too. I usually brush this off right at the beginning when ppl don’t seem to understand the premise, but today I realized what the act had been missing all along. Maybe it will always end this way…
All ready for it… I think Ozi should do the honors.
That’s how the pie goes round!
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Posted by Jusby the Clown
March 31, 2010
Things turned quickly around when the negotiations for the next gig turned from a potential freebie into a professional contract. We celebrated the 1 yr anniversary appearance of Honey & Jusby at the Be The One Mentor Carnival!
Not only did they decide to allow pie-in-the-face, they realized that it was a great bonding experience for Mentors and Mentees to share.
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Posted by Jusby the Clown
January 5, 2010
January - Honey the Clown is born! She attends (approximately) SEVENTEEN events with me in 2009!
February – Trish and I take “The Art of the Tease” class with Miss Indigo Blue and I start reconnecting with David Raffin upon reading his short story “Twilight of the Clowns”. He creates (approximately) SEVENTEEN works of art featuring me in 2009.
March – I continued classes in anthroposophical based clowning with Dawn of the Simple Fool school (of top secret esoteric clowning). Orion turned 5 with a Glow Golf party.
April – An old friend gets stuck on her way home to Alaska and gets the first mini-pie-in-the-face.
I turn 40 and eat fried crickets. I break the 100 pie mark. Honey and I clown at Procession of the Species.
May – Jusby the Engineer is born! Red Nose Brigade parade season starts. I get called into the ring to be an assistant at Circus Gatti! I get interviewed for Folkshine. Jusby the Agent is born.
June – The Timberland Regional Library now has 2 years of the clown magazine “the New Calliope” thanks to me (and the RNB). I order a whipped cream dispenser from e-bay so I can offer sugar free non-dairy organic pies in the face. Honey and I march in the Pride parade. Mish and I do a party in McCleary.
(c) Steve Bloom, the Olympian
July – Pied Monica Drake, author of Clown Girl in Portland… and her husband, and two of their author friends! I bought a red unicycle. I graduated from the Simple Fool school. We see orca whales in the San Juans. Jusby the Referee is born and I break the 200 pie mark!
(c) Greg Wahl-Stephens
August – I pie zombies! I construct the first two models of the flaming pie. The zombies survive.
August - I get a job at a school I used to work at. (I go into the interview with two letters of recommendation from members of the interview committee). They nominate me to lipsynch to Aretha Franklin’s “Respect” at the first assembly. I debut the unicycle. I pie a woman I haven’t seen in 25 years… and her 16 year old daughter. I buy a pair of size 20 shoes for $5.
October -I appear (4 times) in a huge photo collage at Fall Arts Walk in the window of Hot Toddy. Orion and I go to Portland for the Juggling Festival and I practice my unicycle for hours. The alley attends the Northwest Festival of Clowns. I take home three medals and $20 for my shoes (sold to a Belgian clown). I escort people through the Tumwater Halloween House three nights in a row.
November – I meet and pie (of course) Dingo Dizmal and his girlfriend, Olive Rootbeer. I also meet (again) Pamela “Fancie” Woods and her poodle, Olive.
December – I debut my new theme song and the flaming pie at a birthday in Portland. I pie David Raffin’s mother in Lacey. (The pie is not flaming.)
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Posted by Jusby the Clown
December 26, 2009
I like this random facebook status collage and pair of tweetclouds for the year.
I use a lot of… ellipses. I mention chipotle periodically. I pie and pie and pie some more!
< this one mentions “honey’
< but this one really sums up the most important words and works my brand pretty well.
I would knock off a few words and we’d have ad copy
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Posted by Jusby the Clown
December 6, 2009
After reconnecting with Adam McIsaac a year or so ago… I managed to net a long-distance Premium Visit booking for his daughter, Maxine’s birthday.
Here’s the first look at that party and his review (graciously supplied via linkedin).
Orion kept working his way into the act.
Flaming Pie debuts at an actual party!
Surrounded the lady who was scared of clowns at first. [still seems a little guarded, eh?]
“I hired Jusby for my daughter’s fifth birthday party. Certain adults claim to be uncomfortable around clowns, a perception fueled by the entertainment industry, for whom lazy writers will use the casting of the benign and jolly clown into sinister aspect to score cheap suspense points. But clowning is a very old and respected art form; a good clown will work a room according to who is in it. A child’s birthday party, for example, invariably contains adults, and the simpler, child-pleasing act will succeed with adults only insofar as the children are entertained. But this clown is the real deal. Gifted in improvisation, his humor hits on multiple levels: broad comedy for children, delivered with plenty of rapid-fire asides to keep adults laughing, too. He travels loaded for bear, with a bottomless box of props and a long list of extra services, e.g., face-painting, tattooing and so on. We hired him for a two hour premium visit, and probably only made it a third of the way through his total act. He was always busy — and enraptured the children — but with a laid-back aspect; he and his assistant, Honey the Clown, seemed to be more like particularly amusing guests in whiteface rather than a set performance. Many clowns seem to have one thing that they do particularly well with the rest used for filler; Jusby seems to handle every aspect of the clown’s trade well, whatever technical facility he may lack in a given area is filled out by his deep training in theatre, and this is perhaps his strongest point: when he’s working, it seems like the most natural thing in the world to have a clown at your party. - Adam McIsaac, Owner, Pinch a Design Studio
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Posted by Jusby the Clown
October 31, 2009
I brought Honey along to help guide tours!
Now where’s my head?! Where’s the Devilman?!
I lost my stinking head in the maze! and the Devilman got away.
But I found someone’s Driver’s License. I guess I better get it back to them.
Converted ALL the halloween mix tracks to 128kps for smoother playback, to avoid annoying skipping/ artifacts/ dead air from 200+kps & stinking VBR. I will also avoid embarassment at future b-day parties when the music won’t play! way to troubleshoot, Jusby! [It's still a mono system tho *ahem*]
86 Tracks totalled 4.2 hours… which continued even through the power failures. As did the Green Laser!
However, it did require additional AAA batteries from Mike.
The tracks included: Arrington de Dionyso, Angelo Badlamenti, Eliot Smith, Baby Gramps, Bo Bell, Depeche Mode, Diamanda Galas, Dub Narcotic Sound System, Echo & the Bunnymen, Frank Zappa, Gabrielle Roth, Jugala Orchastra of Sunda, the Residents, and Gyoto Monks among many others.
Here’s a comment I got on Olyblog:
Thanks a ton
My young daughter (Wren) really appreciated your guided tour of the haunted house. She knew from last year that you led the less-horrifying tours. She’s a spunky kid in real life, but doesn’t like the buckets-o-gore of this type of show. Her best friends insist they absolutely looooove it, and torment her if she doesn’t go with them on the tour. So she has to go, even though she really doesn’t like it.
This year she sought you out discreetly (for a 10 year old) and attached herself to one of your tours. The un-clueful friends followed along behind her. They didn’t seem to notice EVEN THE TINIEST BIT that they’d missed the full-on horror treatment this year. Afterwards, as the girls resumed trick-or-treating in the neighborhood, Wren dropped back from their pack to rave about what a big favor you were doing, how your abbreviated tour let her save face with her ghoul-tolerant friends for the first time, how smoothly you signaled the performers to let them know to hold back on the monstrousness… She went on for half a block, until her girlfriends interrupted us to tell me how SCARY the CLOWN GUIDE was.
Apparently you were terrifying. Congratulations. What a performance.
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Posted by Jusby the Clown
